Kindness: The Essential Ingredient



Every once in a while you run across someone who restores your faith in humanity.

Chef James Haller is one of those people.

A few years back, I read his book, “Vie de France,” which chronicles a month he and a group of friends spent in the Loire Valley. Haller did the cooking, of course, and it struck me that he prepared food by instinct. No surprise, he’d been cooking professionally for a couple of decades, and is founder of the Blue Strawbery in Portsmouth, N.H.

He sounded like a good person. A nice person. Someone I’d want for a friend. He's won kudos for his inventive appraoch to cooking, too, and I borrowed from his approach and his book as I prepared food during a vacation in the Lot Valley two years ago.

Haller has also written a book called, “What to Eat When You Don’t Feel Like Eating,” which targets a neglected eating constituency: People with life threatening or even terminal illnesses.

So when a friend and co-worker was diagnosed with cancer, I thought of James Haller. I e-mailed him and we arranged a telephone interview.

Turns out he’d written another book, this one aimed at men with prostate cancer. It’s called “Simply Wonderful Food.”

It also turns out that he’s every bit as nice as he sounds in print. He's been volunteering his services to the hospice movement, cooking for sick people for years.

For seriously ill people, Haller recommends comforting foods that are packed with Vitamins A and C. Leafy greens and just about anything orange.

He pays attention to color, texture, taste and nutritional value. He often adds mint to counteract the metallic taste chemotherapy patients experience.

Haller suggests prostate cancer patients eat foods that are easy to digest. Treatment wreaks havoc with the digestive system, he notes.

We can prepare all the time-consuming fancy food we want, French or otherwise, but, as they say, it might not amount to a hill of beans if we forget the most important ingredient: Kindness.

It seems to me that James Haller figured that out long ago. Read more about him here.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Thank you for this. My Grandpa has been going through chemo for Colon Cancer, and I've been meaning to send something his way, but unsure what. I will be looking for James Haller's books ASAP.
Unknown said…
You're welcome, Erika. I was surprised to learn that Mr. Haller has family roots in our area. I really liked him — he cares.
Anonymous said…
Another amazing post, Mimi. And so much to respond to. As I started reading, I thought I'd respond to your comment about preparing food by instinct. But as I read on, I decided that would best be saved for another time.

My mother finally lost her battle with cancer several years ago--a battle she waged heroically off and on for almost two decades. I remember cooking for her during chemo treatment periods when her appetite totally would vanish. Through her urging, I learned to serve her tiny portions of everything. The sight of too much food on her plate would otherwise overwhelm her.

Regarding kindness, I have been absolutely moved by the courage and kindness of Wesley Autrey, the New York construction worker who saved a young man from certain death when he fell onto the subway tracks earlier this week, shielding him with his own body as the train passed overhead. I saw Mr. Autrey on Letterman last night, and he was funny and self-effacing and matter-of-fact about his most heroic act. What a fabulous example he set for his two young daughters--and for us all.
Unknown said…
Oh, Terry, that man in NYC brought tears to my eyes — I did not see him on Letterman, but I saw news clips earlier. To have the presence of mind to do what he did!

I am always so grateful when I hear about these acts of kindness. It is so easy to become jaded in my business.

I am sorry about your mother, Terry. I know that grief comes in waves, not all at once.
Anonymous said…
Mimi, simply: a lovely post. You continue to make me eager to read your blog daily. Very very nice.
Unknown said…
Thanks, Lu.

I think Mr. Haller is doing a wonderful thing for a forgotten segment of the population. He deserves recognition.
savvycityfarmer said…
I find most chefs very kind...good word!
Unknown said…
Isn't that true, city farmer! My father was a very kind person, a soft-hearted man who found it hard to say no to people when they hit him up for favors. I met other chefs who are absolute sweethearts!
Katie said…
What an interesting post! My father (who died of prostate cancer) became addicted to lemon drops - it eliminated the 'not so nice' taste the treatments left in his mouth.
It would have been nice to know of better foods for him....although he always ate everything...
Good job!
Unknown said…
In "Vie de France," Haller book on cooking for himself and friends at a home in the Loire Valley, some of that kindess shines through. I thoroughly enjoyed talking to him and could have written much more!

It seems that cancer makes its way into all of our lives somehow...
Anonymous said…
Mimi,
How I wish my mother had been open to any thought of food as she was going through the treatment for colon cancer that would eventually take her life.
How I wish I'd had the wherewithall to encourage her to take small bites of anything!
How I wish I'd had known about Chef Haller then.
Thank you for another thought provoking, kind-hearted post.
Unknown said…
I am so sorry to learn that so many of you have watched beloved family members lose their appetites during cancer treatments. It touches all of us, one way or the other.

I think sometimes the gently food James Haller recommends would be good for us to consider at any time of stress. It looks easy to make and he does not use a conventional recipe format, only a narrative approach.

Talk about cooking from the heart!
Anonymous said…
As an RN, I know how difficult it is for chemo and cancer patients with food. I'm sure this book will be a big help to a lot of people and that's great.
Sure wish this book was around about 20 years ago when I worked on the Oncology unit. So good for him for caring enough to address the problem.
Unknown said…
Every once in a while you read something written by someone you think sounds kind and caring. I got that feeling right away, when I read his book on France.
Kalyn Denny said…
What a wonderful post. The title drew me right in from the rss reader!
Unknown said…
Thanks, Kalyn. I think cooking for people with these special needs is a wonderful idea.
Farmgirl Cyn said…
As always, an incredible post. You draw me in every time.
Jann said…
This was a moving post for many of us, Mimi.Sometimes I think kindness in certain people slips away,zones out-whatever, as some get caught up in unimportant aspects of their lives-we forget to be nice and the effect it can have on others. Kindness-This is probably one of the most beautiful words in the English language!
Unknown said…
Yes, it is, Jann. We do forget to be kind, don't we, in the hustle and bustle of things?

I am really resolving to be kind in 2007. It's easier and much more pleasant than being unkind.
Unknown said…
Thanks, Cyn. You are kind yourself.

BTW, I thought of you tonight as I photographed a brown egg.
Anonymous said…
And there is so much love in kindness. It is the sign of a kind and intellegent person who uses themself and their talent to find real and practical solutions to problems that others of us are unable to address.
Thank you for your kind thoughtfulnes!
Unknown said…
Tanna, the responses to this post have truly convinced that kindness is the essential ingredient.

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